July - August

Well I have been missing off of here - it has been a rough couple of months this July and August but I have made it through and September is on the horizon!!! Where do I begin ...

July saw the flipping of the hyperthyroid to hypothyroid and I went from having panic attacks to exhaustion that was brutal. I am one of those people who no matter what I can will myself to go do whatever needs to be done but this was so intense that I could not move off of the couch. I managed to preform well at work and make a 9 day trip back to New Jersey to learn some more skills from our ground team but the fall out from that trip put me in bed for 4 days and while my blood work showed that my TCH was moving in the right direction my body was telling me it had had enough. I took it easy for a few days and then embarked on getting back into Yoga - I lasted a week before the brutal hot flashes and night sweats halted that and I spent a weekend sleeping. I will start the yoga again but I think my body is still working on getting the interferon out of my system and while the hot flashes and night sweats are a pain - it has I think facilitated moving the interferon out of my system!!

August saw the culmination that led to the end of a work relationship and the realization of how stress at work was impacting my health.After 5 months of added stress and constant undermining I finally spoke up and while it felt good to vent - it meant the end of a friendship and the parting of ways - something that I took very hard.  I treasure my friends, even the ones who are drama queens! Finally the impending departure of a great employee - I am now learning her job and taking on those duties as well as my own - more stress so I have purchased BKS Iyengars book and I am determined to start Yoga again - committing that 90 minutes a day to me and the care of my body. September 1 is my 10 month NED and I plan on spending it floating down the Salt River - a summer activity I love that has been absent from my summer. Not to worry I will be wearing 50 spf I have a hat and a beautiful cover-up from Maui that I will be wearing - I can't wait - I love watching the bird, the wild horses and the thrill of the 'rapids'!! Won't let a little cancer stop me from having fun!

June

Sorry June was a little crazy for me - I had cleared all of my May appointments in preparation of a trip that was postpone - so things got a bit backed up. I had my surgical and oncology follow ups with out incident - on 6/19 I had a full hysterectomy and the testing on that came back negative for cancer. A mammogram revealed a lump - had followup mammograms I was scheduled for a needle aspiration and possible biopsy. I had those today - the aspiration caused the lump to shrivel up and go away so that was awesome and I found out that the reason for my recent exhaustion is because after the hysterectomy my thyroid went from way hyper to hypo so they are slowing down on the drugs....life is getting back to normal - once I get the exhaustion under control I can get back in the gym and doing yoga!! Oh and my hair is finally growing life is getting back to normal!!

May 2014

May - in March a  man expressed interest in dating me which was weird for me because I feel anything but attractive I did lose all of my hair but by May I had my concerns about how this person; :their inability to keep commitments and the language they used in communication. Needless to say by June 1 with the announcement that I had 'inspired them to return to their religion/ led me to learn more.  I have to admit I was concerned with sites called it a cult - but when I saw they did not allow

• dating or marriage outside the religion I thought wow - so I did some more digging. 
• If you have a blood donation the church shuns or disfellowhips  you 
•  they have their own bible that scholars state is slanted to church doctrine. 
• If a members family is not in good standing that member could be forced out of positions they hold in the church. 

I quickly realized that  his decision to 'return to his faith' was the end of our relationship - I had been grilled excessively about my religious beliefs and had answered honestly and quickly. This was not to be the case it was as if this person could not explain the things I found online - so I asked if his church told him he could not longer date me would he comply. He immediately became upset with me - the aggressive, name calling behavior was back and he disconnected the call - I knew that night it was over but to add to my stress it took him 3 days to respond to my question. The lesson in all of this is that I have far too much on my plate and I just don't have the energy or patience to deal with the emotional garbage of dating. I need to focus on me and my health - I need to be selfish and anyone who can't understand and accept this needs to move on to the next girl because this girl is staying focused on her health. No sweet talking man is going to derail my focus and my drive to be selfish and take care of only me.

On the medical front - my thyroid is a mess and the first and second rounds have failed to get it under control. We are on to round 3 of a drug that makes you lose your hair - and the hits keep coming! I went through my preop appointment with my to do list for the night before - Citrate magnesium and a Fleet enema - yes seriously and my full hysterectomy is scheduled for June 19th at 1030a, I get to spend the night in the hospital and then it home to rest for 3 days and no driving for 2 weeks. Oncology appointment tomorrow - scans and blood tests are done so now I wait to see what they show...or if Interferon has damaged more of my body.

So April - I am back working from home - they found another mole - it was SITU, found out I am Hyperthyroid, have to have a hysterectomy and they want to do a 2 hour adrenal test on me - Interferon gift that keeps on giving!!

Today is the day I get the results of my scans and the game plan if it hasn't

After doing all my reading and researching today I find out if the cancer has spread - if so I am back to square one...but here is my plan.

1. Spend the next month enjoying the holiday season 
2. Early January - surgical procedures
3. Late January - start 30 days of Interferon or 48 weeks
4. Mid - March return to work
5. Change diet to completely vegan
6. Practice Yoga daily to strengthen my immune system.
7. Manage side effect with pharmaceuticals if needed

 2014 will be consumed by my quest to kill this disease off - but for 2015 I will be back and traveling - I think an epic trip to Europe is in order!  Maybe start in London for a few days - go to Highclere castle, next is Paris for a few days before heading to the coast, then it is on to the Cinque Terre and an epic journey in Italy!! It is always good to have goals and my pot of gold at the end of the cancer rainbow is an epic journey to Europe!

I bought a juicer and the events of this weekend....

One of the benefits of Black Friday was that Macy's had juicers on sale for 40 percent off so after reading that cooking on Interferon would be difficult with the nausea I decided to venture out and buy one. I didn't get the masticating one that so many recommended because I will be drinking it at the time it is juiced that and the fact that they were twice the price of the one I bought and since I have not juiced ever before I thought this was a great entry level juicer - a Breville 2 speed Juice fountain. I have not tested it out but I need to make run to Sprouts for some Apples and Carrots.

I am following the  No No Vegan diet - I call it that because when I say I only a plant based diet - this means no I don't eat meat and no I don't eat cheese but I do eat potatoes, brussel sprouts, carrots, squash, apple, oranges, lemons cranberries, cherries, lentils, quinoa, beans and so much more. People tend to focus on No I don't eat meat and No I don't eat cheese hence the name the No No Diet!

I got to spend some time this weekend with friends who will support me through this walk and feel truly blessed...I am not sure how I am going to manage this but I know if I need it I can reach out to them!!

Black Friday!

Up early this morning - going in to work - never have been much of a shopper this weekend for me prior to the Gluten allergy diagnosis was the kickoff to my holiday baking season. Back in the day I would make upwards of 20 different types of holiday bake goods - much of which would be given to friends and family for Christmas gifts- my Dad loved the orange almond biscotti and would dunk it in his coffee. My love for cooking has not faded but in recent years I have not baked like I used to - I should get back into baking but Vegan and Gluten free!

Today I was on Pinterest looking at short hair - one of the side effects of Interferon is hair loss so while I have been growing my hair but with this on my horizon - I think that going back to the Pixie is prudent at this point. I still am a fan of Ginnifer Goodwin's short style but also loving Jennifer Lawrence's new hairdo as well!

I had a nice quiet pajama day yesterday and took a moment to absorb all that I learned last week about the cancer - and came to terms with where I am. Looking forward to finding out more on Tuesday and planning what my next steps are. More research showed studies with High Dose Interferon aka HDI for one month gave the same results as the 48 week dosage so definitely something to discuss, in addition to this study I did find that there is a slow release Pegylated Interferon aka PEG - IFN that is administered weekly so whether I need the 1 month or the 48 week - management of my treatment just got a little better. 

Well time for work - off I go

Namaste to all!